2012-2013

I know I haven't written in a while, but that is just because there has not been much going on in my life except for school, work, and sorority life. Well this semester I started Block 1. This is the start of the teaching program here at ESU. That means that I have 3 semester left of my college career. WOW! Is that crazy or what? I am nervous but also excited. I am nervous to be out of college and on my own, but I am excited to teach kids. I have wanted to be a teacher since I was in the second grade. My second grade teacher was amazing. i wanted to be just like her. She was very kind to all of us in her class. Over break, I went to visit my elementary school and all the teachers that I had were so happy for me and told that if I needed anything to let them know or when I started my student teaching to see if I can get them as my mentor teacher. I love having connections to teachers and other people who work in schools.
In my sorority, things are going great. This year, I got a new Little. Her name is Kayla. She is amazing and crazy in the good way. We have a good time together just hanging out watching movies.

For Christmas I got a tablet and found this really cool app on it. It has all the daily readings, Liturgy of the Hours, an interactive Rosary, and lots of prayers on it. I have started doing Liturgy of the Hours on this week. It is so easy to use because it goes in order of what you read for it. 

The one thing that I am looking forward to this semester is KCCSC, which is Kansas Catholic College Students Conference (Convention). It is in Wichita this year and I know a lot of people who are planning it, because they go to WSU. It is a whole weekend with speakers, Adoration, a dance, and other things. This will be my third year of going. It is a lot like DCYC that Wichita puts of for high school Catholics in the diocese.

Until next time,

Nikki Spexarth

Awakening 2012

This past weekend I went on a retreat called Awakening. I went to this retreat last year and had an awesome time. This year I was a table parent and had to give a talk about Faith. Being a parent was an amazing experience like being a table leader on TEC. Weeks before the retreat, I was nervous because of the talk that I was going to give. In my talk, I talk about my mom and my struggles with my faith and God after all that has happened in my life. Even the day I was giving my talk, I was nervous until I started talking. Once I was up there, I got comfortable and i just let the Holy Spirit give my the words to say. I think that my talk went good. Some of the retreaters were crying by the end and they said that I had some kind of impact on their lives. I did not know that I could make an impact on others because of my story and how far I have come. The song that I chose is "What Faith Can Do" by Kutless. This song I chose because it describes what faith feels like when you have it. You can always fall back on your Faith when you are down and feeling like you have hit rock bottom.

The song for the weekend is "How He Loves" by David Crowder. This song tells us that God loves us now matter what. HE loves us unconditionally, meaning that know matter what we have done, He still loves us and that He will never stop loving us.

This pictures describes us for the whole weekend. We were crazy and fun, but with a side that we were serious when we needed to be. 

That is all for now. Have a great day!

Summer 2012

Summer 2012 went by way to fast. I worked and went to Music Theater all summer long. The best show for me is between 9 to 5 and Legally Blonde. Both of them were about women becoming who they are and can achieve anything once they set their minds to it. I did get to serve on TEC# 133. That weekend was so amazing I don't even know how to describe it. It was fun, exciting, but very exhausting and worth it. I met many wonderful people and got to know the ones I do know more. The best part was on Sunday night when a lot of us who were serving did a slip'n'slide with two long tarps. It took me awhile to do it because I was scared, but once I did it, it was so much fun. I owe Autumn for getting me to do it. Then I went to Colorado for about 6 days. It was so beautiful there and peaceful. The temperature was like in the 70s the whole time we were there. Not only did I go shopping in the little stores in Breckenridge, CO, but I also was able to ride a horse. The ride was so much fun and the horse was just like me. What I mean is that she, Huggsie, took her time going up and down the mountain, watching where she stepped. Besides what I did, I was able to kind of figure out my life. I don't know if it will ever happened but it is fun to have that in the back of my mind. The things I wish that I did was hanging out with my friends more. I was always working or didn't feel like going whenever they would be getting together. Now that I am back at school, I miss Colorado. When I got back from CO, I was home for almost two days and then I had to come to school. I feel as if I am home sick but it is for CO and not for home. It is hard to explain but I definitely feel that way. The one thing that I am happy about it being back with my sisters. I have missed them a lot this summer, so it feels great to be with them again. I think that once school starts it will be better, but right now it feels just weird. Until next time.

Today

Today, May 6, 2012 was First Communion at Didde Catholic Center. This made me remember my First Communion. The only thing that I remember, though, was that one of the girls fainted and she was sitting right next to me. It was a hot day and she was wearing a dress that had long sleeves. Before that day, I remember my mom, aunt Donna, aunt Jan, and I going shopping for my dress. We finally found one that all of us liked at Burlington Coat Factory on the east side of Wichita. the years after mine, my mom always said that she like my dress the best. I do remember having a party afterwards at my house with all my family and friends of the family. It was great to have the family there to celebrate being Catholic. Back to today, I was one of the Eucharistic Ministers for the First Communion. I was not the one to give the Body or Blood of Christ, but I was there to give the Blood to their families. I love days like this that make me so happy that I am a Catholic and that there are others out there that are just like me.

This song is for all of you. Remember who you are and who you belong to.

The Passion Of Christ

Tonight was the first time that I saw The Passion for this Lent. Every time I see it, my emotions get the best of me. Growing up I new that Christ went through a lot for us, but I didn't know how much that was until I saw the movie. Seeing something that is taken from what actually happened in real life puts it all into perspective. Christ DIED for all of us! He loves us all, even when we sin. The one thing that I love about watching the movie is watching it with amazing friends who feel the exact same way you do. I could not tell you, out of two times that I've seen the movie with friends, who wasn't emotional. They understand and will be crying right there with you because they know what Christ did for them too.

This song is amazing! The pictures and other videos are from the movie. I could not imagine what Mary went through when her Son died. Just remember that Christ died for you and me so that we can live!

TEC songs #2

The third song is "Before the Morning" by Josh Wilson. This song was for TEC 126. I was on the Resource Team, with an amazing table leader and amazing candidates. A couple of weeks before the weekend, my aunt was diagnosed with breast cancer. The same thing that my mom died from. My aunt was my mom's sister. I was really in a dark place after that, but this song helped me realized there is going to be a bright light in my life (the morning).

The fourth song is "By Your Side" by Tenth Avenue North. This song was for TEC 129. This was the first time that I went down to Pittsburgh for a TEC. I had a really bad summer after my Grandma past away. She was my mom's mom and I didn't even get to day goodbye to her. I felt like maybe I wasn't suppose to be living and what is the point of life. God knew I had to be on that TEC because of what some people talked about in their meditations.

The last song is "I lift my Hands" by Chris Tomlin. This was for TEC 130. This TEC was as amazing weekend where I met wonderful people who are on fire with their faith. I was on Resource for this TEC and our table name was Blessed Are You Among Women. We only had one guy on our table with six girls. It was a great time. I had to give a talk and I get nervous talking in front of people but as I was giving my talk my nerves went away. My friend, who was on this TEC, knew exactly what I was feeling and her prayer helped me through the weekend.


There will be more songs for as long as I go on TECs so more will be posted on a later date. 

The TEC songs #1

I know there are a lot of people who know me and my life, but do not know what has helped me get through the tough times. The people who I have met in the last two and half years know what that thing is. It is a retreat called TEC, which stands for Teens Encounter Christ. The wonderful people have helped me grow closer to God by just being there for me and offering prayers whenever I need them. One of things that TEC has showed me more of is Christian Songs. I now love a lot of songs that I never in my life thought that I would. 

The first song is "Friends" by Michael W. Smith. This song is the theme of all of the TECs in the Wichita Diocese. This song explains us very well. We are friends but more like a family, that's were framily comes into play, a friend family. We grow as a family through the weekends being together and outside of the retreats. When I see people from the TEC Framily, I get so happy and excited just because. I feel more like myself when I am around them than with anyone else. I can't explain it, it just is. 

The second song is "You Never Let Go" by Matt Redman. This song is from my very first TEC. This song helped me to come back to God. After my Mom died, I felt as if He didn't care about me and I was mad at Him for her away from me. It taught me that He is always there even when you don't think He is there, He is. Whenever I hear this song, it takes me back to TEC 122, where I met some amazing people who became friends. I am grateful for those people who were on my table because they were the ones that helped me the most.

The Third song is "I'm Letting Go" by Francesca Battistelli. This was on TEC 124. I was very excited to be on this TEC. The one thing though was that I was not sure how I would feel to be there on the date because of what the date was. To begin this TEC was suppose to be in Hutch on the first weekend in June, but it was in Wichita on June 26th through 28th. The 26th was the day that my Mom died six years before. The first day of TEC is called Die Day. You die to yourself to let Christ's resurrection save you. I had a lot of time to spend in adoration on that day and it was on of the best days I had ever had. I was with friends who care for me and want me to be my best. They were real supportive through the weekend. This song is one that we chose for the weekend and it describes that a person has to let go to let Him take control. I know that sometimes it can be hard to let go, but it is worth it in the end.